Justin Masterson wanted us all to have free coffee. The bullpen felt we are too caffeinated as it is.
(Photo from Boston.com)
I'm sorry, but that picture up there looks like puppies and sunshine and puppies frolicking in the sunshine, maybe with adorable kittens holding tiny teddy bears saying "I love you beary much!" on their tummies or something. That is how adorable that picture is. Justin Masterson, ladies and gentlemen: Better than Animal Planet's Puppy Bowl.
And seeing as how Dunkin' Donuts is still running their free coffee or tea promotion (with purchase, naturally) the day after the Sox win, I like to think that Little Justin Masterson (he's 6'6" so obviously we're speaking figuratively) did the necessary research beforehand to make sure that it didn't have to be Papelbon getting the win for the masses to get free coffee because, darn it, Clay gave us all a no-hitter that one time, not to mention that Jacoby won Tacos for America in the World Series and really, Lil' J-Mast just wanted to contribute. He thought free coffee would be a nice way to say "Thank you for letting me pitch for your major league team, Boston. Thank you for not crying when the entire team came down with the death flu and the front office was forced to import Little Leaguers from Saugus to put warm bodies on the field."
He sure did try his damndest.
The bullpen, apparently, thinks we're all already too caffeinated as it is.
Speaking for me personally, they might have a point.