"Hell may have no fury like a woman scorned but heaven hath no sweetness like a sports fan vindicated." - Samcat

Friday, June 06, 2008

Playing Nice with Others

(Photo from Boston.com)

Awww, you guys, it's such a throwback, this whole brawling with the Rays thing. Remember when Pedro used to get into it with them and Tek would have to tackle the batter who charged the mound from behind and then Brian Daubach would start throwing haymakers and Trotter would be "giving some information?" Last night made me almost nostalgic for that.

Okay, full disclosure, I didn't see the fight when it originally happened as I was out running - my longest run yet at 7.25 miles (go me!) - so only got the report when I got home and called Amy.

"Yeah, so Coco got in a fight."

"Like, with the umpires? Because he was kinda pissed at them last night."

"No, with Shields. He charged the mound after he got hit with a pitch."

"Coco's a little bit of a punk, isn't he?"

"I think he missed snack time due to the early start."

And then all kinds of shenanigans happened with Jacoby rolling his wrist in center (what did I just say about all the cool kids wanting to hang out on the DL?) and JD Drew playing center and Youkilis(!) in right and Chris Carter (not to be confused with former Minnesota Vikings wide receiver Cris Carter), in left and then Kevin Cash serving as both bullpen catcher and DH.

Coco's locker room interview in which he held forth on the proper way to fight - "And I actually credit Shields, too. Even though we went at it, he hit me in the leg, he didn't try to hit me in the head. He didn't try to kill me. I ran out there and then he tried to hit me in the head. That's the way to go." - was interesting. But I suspect his repeatedly calling the Rays "little girls" is going to carry over. Also, that's big talk from a man in braids and beads.

There was also that little matter of the skirmish between Youks and Manny in the dugout.

"Just a lot of testosterone flying around out there tonight," Tito said in his postgame. "I wanted to kick Millsy's ass."

One hopes it really was just testosterone and that it is, as both Tito and Dave McCarty suggested, "Taken care of." McCarty was quick to point out that these things happen all the time on major league teams, just not usually in the dugout in front of cameras. But I'm thinking, considering the parties involved, isn't it entirely possible - and maybe even probable - that what we saw was a result of a wet willie or perhaps that favorite of little brothers everywhere, "I'm not touching you! Can't do anything, I'm not touching you!"?

What I'm saying is, I don't think we should worry too much about the chemistry on the Good Ship Red Sox. After all, we have Sean Casey: Peacemaker. He'll appease all parties and get them separate coloring books and Tek will give everyone Dad Face and everything will be fine. Problem solved.

What I am worried about is Jacoby's wrist and Manny's hammy. Because we kind of need both of those body parts. I mean, god love ya, Chris Carter, but you are no Manny Ramirez.

Also, lost in the Fight Club: Red Sox Edition is the fact that Jon Lester pitched himself a hell of a game and managed to stay out of the fray. Impressive, that.

Tonight the Mariners are in town with their tirade-prone manager John McLaren at the helm. That man is spitting fire, boys. Watch out. Oh, and Coco, if you see the Mariner Moose? Run.

In addition? Way to go, Celtics. ::fist bumps::