Eyewitness confirms Gamecast nonsense.

(Photo from Boston.com)

I had spies at the game, you see. That's how I was able to confirm the seemingly insane reports from Gamecast that were telling me that JD "Jessica" Drew hit a grand slam in yesterday's afternoon game. Amy and Sam were there and they saw it. And though they've been known to hallucinate on occasion, it was two in the afternoon and they seemed to have their wits about them. So yes, JD Drew did, in fact hit a grand slam yesterday. Will wonders never cease?

As did Mike Lowell but that is much easier to believe. I mean, would you look at this man? Mike Lowell is a Silver Fox, my friends. And you know what silver foxes do in baseball? Hit grand slams. That's right. Remember when Bill Mueller hit two in the same game from opposite sides of the plate against the Rangers a few years ago? I do. So basically, the Mueller to Lowell trajectory is working out perfectly. Which is handy since I was pretty sure I would never love anyone like I loved Bill Mueller.

Anyway, Matsuzaka, despite getting his eighth win without a loss is still somewhat worrisome. That boy likes high pitch counts and digging himself holes, doesn't he? It would be tempting to chalk it up to the fact that he wasn't throwing to Tek yesterday but really, he's a major league pitcher. You have to be able to not walk the ballpark to get the job done.

You also have to be able to not give up nine runs to the Kansas City Royals, CRAIG HANSEN AND DAVID AARDSMA. I find Craig Hansen to be particularly infuriating since some days, like Wednesday, he's positively lights out. And then the very next day he'll be all "Here's a home run for you. And a walk for you, and here's a home run for your friend there." And don't give me "fatigue" because you're a major league reliever. You have to be able to pitch in back to back games. Apparently my argument today is that if you're a "major league something or other," I don't want to hear excuses. "You're a major league bat boy, son. You have to be able to put the right amount of pine tar on the bat. Let's see some hustle out there."

All right, I concede that I'm nitpicking since the Sox did just manage two series sweeps and a perfect 7-0 homestand. Maybe I'm like the gruff coach who rides his charges hard but only because he loves them so much. Tough love and all. Except for you, Lugo. You I'm still watching.

So tonight the Sox head to Oakland where things promise to be a bit different in terms of facing good pitching. Damn west coast time difference. As for me, I'm running in my first road race this weekend, the 11th Annual Runner's Alley/Redhook Memorial 5K in Portsmouth, NH. This is all in training for the larger goal of the half marathon in November but you gotta start somewhere, right? I've managed to rope Greta, Amy, Colleen AND The Rick and The Sue into participating with me. And possibly my brother if he manages to make it home from a bachelor party in time. But there's beer at the end of the race so perhaps that'll be an enticement. Anyway, wish us luck.

And finally, this weekend is also time to celebrate the birthdays of both Father of Basegirl, The Rick, and Brother of Basegirl, Kevin. (Perhaps we'll make Kev run in a party hat). Without these two, I wouldn't be half as insane and sports obsessed as I am. So basically, it's their fault. Show 'em some birthday love, eh?

Happy Memorial Day, everyone. Enjoy!