"Hell may have no fury like a woman scorned but heaven hath no sweetness like a sports fan vindicated." - Samcat

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Sadness in Birdland

(Photo from Yahoo! Sports)

Is that supposed to be Sean Casey's mean face up there? His "I might be the nicest guy in the world but I'm totally holding back David Ortiz and he's a really large man and I am willing to throw down with him because he is my teammate, dammit" face? Or is it more, "Oh please god, can't we settle this with a nice game of Go Fish and some organic apple juice?"

Sigh. Also? No disrespect, Papi. But I'm pretty sure you went around.

Poor Brad Mills. Not only does he have to man the helm for a few days in Tito's absence but suddenly he has to deal with JD Drew nearly pulling a Hideki Matsui in right field, sticking The Big KY in the outfield, Coco being struck down with a tummy ache and then Ortiz flying off the handle. Really, boys, I think the man has enough on his plate.

Greta's theory about Coco's gastrointestinal issues is that visiting players are just not used to the Old Bay they put on everything in Baltimore. That's a problem, if a delicious one. I wonder if that's Josh Beckett's problem or if he unwisely accepted an invitation to go out on the town with Kevin Millar before the game. Millar seems like just the type of guy to take out the next day's starting pitcher for crabs and Natty Boh and perhaps some strippers. Kevin Millar's a one man welcome wagon, my friends. And he's our friend and we will always love Kevin Millar, but perhaps we should issue a blanket statement to the Red Sox that prior to the games, they are not allowed to accept drinks or entertainment from Kevin Millar. It just seems wise.