%&#*?&%@*%$

Subtitled: The Post In Which Kristen Attempts To Express Her Angst At The Current Situation Without Using All The Swear Words.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Well, so much for that.

Did you guys know that Mike Lowell is our emergency backup catcher?

::giggles maniacally::

Did you know that when Varitek went on the DL during the 2001 season that the team went completely to shit?

::curls up in fetal position::

Do you like how our everyday catcher is now a guy batting a robust .183?

::attempts to slit wrists with pretzel sticks::

Between this and the heat, I fear I shall not last much longer. I'm about one 90-plus day away from hunkering down in a bomb shelter with twelve-hundred boxes of Pop-Tarts and fifteen cases of Diet Coke with only my own thoughts and a DVD of Faith Rewarded to keep me company. I promise you, that won't end well.

::drinks rum directly from the bottle::